Much has been made of late about the new “hands-on” approach TSA Screeners are applying to passengers at the nation’s airports. The full-body pat-downs and new imaging devices that are being implemented have, needless to say, been greeted with all the joy of a bridal party welcoming a party of skunks and drunk hillbillies to a June garden wedding at the Country Club (think “Caddyshack,” folks).

With a flood of vocal protests coming from the various unions representing airline pilots and flight attendants, as well as religious groups and the travelling public, DHS Secretary Janet Napolitano and TSA Administrator John Pistole have the distinction of owning what can only be called the worst of In-Boxes. Only making matters worse are planned protests by airline travelling passengers around the Thanksgiving holiday, which will not only grind the airport security lines to a stop during the busiest time of travel but give us all kinds of amusing and uncomfortable stories about searches that either go too far or grab hold of something you’d rather not have held onto…unless you’re into that kind of thing.

I guess there are lots of ways to get your hands around this hot issue and feel your way through it, but the good people at Despair, Inc. have the answers and messaging that say it all.

No word on whether the proprietors behind these new wardrobe offerings are bidding on any upcoming uniform contracts at TSA, but they’ve got my vote, “hands down.”

Editor’s note: Security Debrief does not endorse the above-noted t-shirts, nor any other product or service.

Rich Cooper blogs primarily on emergency preparedness and response, management issues related to the Department of Homeland Security, and the private sector’s role in homeland security. Read More